


All the dreams I'm chasing

by JuliaBaggins



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Light Angst, Loki Needs a Hug, M/M, Spoilers for Thor: Ragnarok, Thor (Marvel) Needs a Hug, a little fluff, i sooo wanted to see that hug in the movie and so i had to write it, oh and they might be holding hands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-31
Updated: 2017-10-31
Packaged: 2019-01-27 12:12:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12581632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JuliaBaggins/pseuds/JuliaBaggins
Summary: Spoilers for Thor: Ragnarok!My take on that hug-scene, and some of Thor's & Loki's feelings.





	All the dreams I'm chasing

**Author's Note:**

> I dearly loved the movie for a hundred and one reasons, but I'm sad that we didn't get to see that hug, and so I wrote this little story :)

Loki was standing in front of the metal door to what he had been told were Thor’s rooms. With his hand already raised for the doorknob, he was waiting. Hesitating. When he had walked here, there had been a plan, clever sentences already thought out in his head, but now, Loki wasn’t sure if he should go in there at all. And it had been a long day, he was so tired and even if he wouldn’t have been, he had come to realize that the one person he wasn’t good at lying to was himself. So, he knew that he was scared. Scared of what his brother (his king? This still sounded weird to Loki) might say to him. 

Of course, Loki had helped to save the day, save their people and defeat Hela, but still.. Now that this was done, he wasn’t sure if Thor would want him to stay. Not after their talk in the elevator, where Thor had told him how it might be better if they parted ways for good. Better for both of them. And hadn’t Loki wanted him to disagree then? Didn’t he still want to stay? He was not sure if he would admit it to anyone, not even his brother, or maybe especially not him, but right now, he felt that he _wanted_ to stay here. Here, at this crowded, run-down spaceship, or wherever Thor might go after this. And maybe these feelings, these wishes, maybe they weren’t entirely new, but it was new to Loki to admit them.

 

Thor’s eye was fixed on his own reflection in the mirror, and oh, how different he looked to how he always had known himself. It wasn’t just the eye, or the hair (though he dearly missed it), there was more to it. When he looked at himself now, Thor saw an older version of himself, a man with more lines on his forehead, responsibilities heavy on his shoulders, but not much of the arrogance he used to carry himself with left. Thor wondered if this was finally the look of a king. And, still looking at his own face, the seriousness there, Thor wondered when his lips might find themselves smiling the next time, if they would at all. With all that he had lost recently, it seemed unlikely.

Suddenly, there was another face that Thor saw in the mirror, looking at him. A smile was playing around Loki’s lips, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. For a moment, both of them just stood there, staring at each other; thoughts and even more thoughts chasing around in their heads while their lips remained closed. It shouldn’t have surprised Thor when Loki finally spoke, as he had always been the more articulate out of them.

“It suits you, you know”, Loki commented, talking about the eyepatch. (With the short hair, he wasn’t so sure yet.)

Thor slowly turned around, eyes fixed on his brother. He told Loki how important his help had been today, and it wasn’t a _Thank you,_ not quite, but Loki didn’t need one. Not if Thor continued talking to him in a voice like this.

“If you were actually here, I might have hugged you”, Thor continued, and he wondered if Loki recognized it. The wishing he couldn’t quite keep out of his voice; how he would have _liked_ it if his brother was here. How he wished that he was.

It had become a habit by now, throwing whatever was closest to him at one of Loki’s illusions, and today was no different to Thor. Well, it wasn’t when he threw the crystalline stopper in his brother’s direction. But things started to get oh so different when Loki caught the little object without effort, a small smile accompanying the action. Thor recognized this smile. It wasn’t the cocky grin of the god of mischief, and it wasn’t a baring of teeth of an enemy. This was an honest smile, the smile of _his little brother_ , and before he could think about it, Thor had taken a few steps in Loki’s direction.

 

Thor stopped his walk in front of Loki, not quite close enough that they could have touched each other if they wanted, but nearly. Loki’s eyes were fixed on him, so familiar it made Thor’s heart ache, and yet, the expression they held was something he hadn’t seen there in a long time. Vulnerability. It made Thor want to reach out and never let Loki go, but somehow, he found himself frozen to the spot. Just looking at his brother. At his brother who, oh so slowly and with his lips slightly parted, as if he wanted to say something but wasn’t sure what, took a step closer towards Thor. 

This was all it took for Thor to finally, _finally_ take his brother into his arms, hugging him close to his chest. And though this already felt good, felt like _home_ , it was nothing compared to the feeling of when Loki wrapped his arms around Thor, melting into the hug and nearly clinging to his big brother. 

Loki didn’t know how long they stood there just holding each other, and he didn’t mind. Not when he couldn’t have said when the last time someone had touched him so tenderly had been; not when everything he felt was _Thor_ and _home_ and _safe._

When they finally parted their hug, not clinging to each other anymore but still standing in each other’s space, Thor found an answer to something he had asked himself earlier. His lips still were very well capable of smiling, and right now, his smile was directed at his brother. Once again, Loki was just looking at him, an expression Thor couldn’t quite make sense of in his eyes.

“You’re thinking too much”, Thor murmured, and Loki couldn’t help but laugh at that. 

 

Hours later, Thor and Loki found themselves alone once again, standing next to each other while looking into the depths of space through the large window. Thor had started talking about a new place for their people, about returning to earth once again, and Loki felt himself getting nervous, an unpleasant kind of nervous, though he did his best to hide it.

“Do you really think returning to earth is a good idea?”, Loki asked, and Thor answered with a bright smile.

“Oh yes, I happen to be quite popular on earth.”

This felt like a stab to Loki’s heart, though he knew it shouldn’t. And it wasn’t how the people loved his brother and very much didn’t love him, this came as no surprise, no. The cause of Loki’s unease was his knowledge that _he_ couldn’t return to earth, and it hurt how Thor still seemed to think that it would be better for them to part ways. To never see each other again. Still, he needed to hear it, needed his brother to say the words.

“Okay, I’ll specify: Do you actually think that _me_ returning to earth would be wise?”

Loki tried talking with the hint of a joke between the lines, and he thought it worked quite well. It would have been so easy for Thor to say how _of course_ Loki couldn’t return there, to laugh it off, but Thor did none of this. Instead, he just looked at his brother. Looked at him like he couldn’t make sense of his words, and then, Thor did something that utterly surprised Loki. He took his hand in his, holding onto it tightly, and then he said how it would be fine. And this was so much better than all that Loki barely admitted of dreaming of, because it meant not only that Thor wanted him to stay, stay by his side, no – there was a whispering of _I will protect you_ somewhere underneath Thor’s words, and Loki knew how very much he was capable of taking care of himself, but still… It warmed his heart, and he held onto Thor’s hand a little tighter. 

Thor looked out onto the stars, taking in their beauty, and he felt his body relax a bit. He might have lost his world today, but when he heard the chatter of his people from deeper inside the ship, he knew that he hadn’t lost his home; and he might have lost his father and a sister he hadn’t know at all, but when he felt Loki’s hand in his, delicate fingers that felt oh so cold in his, Thor knew that he hadn’t lost his family. And right now, this was all he needed to look into the future with hope in his chest. The stars above him, and Loki by his side.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Nice comments would make my day ❤
> 
> Title from James Blunt's "Make me better"


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